They say that throughout your life you should challenge yourself, push a little harder, step out of your comfort zone, take a risk....Irritating isn't it? I like my comfort zone. It's comfortable. But 'they' are right.
And so I have decided ( drum roll please...) that I am going to publish one of my books myself.
Just seeing those words written down makes my heart race and my head hurt. I've been bouncing this idea backwards and forwards for what feels like forever. Indeed, part of the reason that I'm announcing it here, in full view of everyone, is to make it more difficult for me to change my mind again. But I need to do it so that I can stop wasting so much energy prevaricating about it.
You see, this is not how I envisaged my burgeoning writing career progressing. When I started writing novels, I didn't factor in the enormous reluctance that I feel to let anything go. I thought I'd end up with lots of finished manuscripts and then I could try my hand at getting them published like everyone else. How hard can it be to write it, send it out and deal with the rejections? Well, harder than you'd think as it turns out.
Also the publishing world looks very different to how it did when I started writing five years ago. In my head, those who self-publish have always been either arrogant or rubbish or quite possibly both. What's that terrible expression? Those who can, do. Those who can't self-publish.
But I'm reliably informed by those who know these things that the industry has moved on. Of course, there are still those authors who fall into the categories listed above (please don't let that be me) but there are also writers who actually choose to take the self-publishing route because it allows them to keep control of their work, how it is published, priced, marketed and distributed.
I do have to say that I am still cloaked in doubt and fear but on the basis that I'll try almost anything once, I have decided to self-publish my young adult novel, Mummy's Girl. Very soon. It won't be under my own name - I'm not that brave- but don't worry oh loyal blog readers. As soon as I'm ready to go you will read about it here and no doubt have the opportunity to purchase said novel and tell me what you think.
So if you know any girls aged between 12 and 15 who like a rip-roaring yarn about how hard it is to grow up then watch this space. I might have just the thing for them.