I've been shopping. I can't help it. It's that change of season thing. And so even though the sun is still beating down and there is no prospect of wearing any of my purchases until the weather turns chilly, I still shopped.
Today is the first day to myself since the middle on July and I have been thinking long and hard about how to spend it. There were plenty of options. I rejected housework out of hand. There was a time when I would have dealt with that first before engaging in frivolous activity but those days are well and truly behind me.
I thought about doing some exercise, this being something else that has taken a back seat whilst the children were at home but I concluded that walking round the shops carrying bags is almost as good for me as running round a wood carrying an ipod so I rejected that too.
Something at the computer was another possibility. I now have my course materials and details of the assignments that I will have to complete and some of my fellow students seem to be dashing on ahead. But the course doesn't actually start until October. No need to rush. And there was my book and my blog but, as I rightly surmised, I could work on those later. No contest then - shopping won hands down.
So I deposited the children and hot footed it to the station to catch the train to Leeds. I haven't been shopping for a while. I didn't really buy anything new in spring or summer, choosing instead to wear things that were already lurking in my wardrobe. As a result, the little fund that I save for unnecessary extravagances was looking healthy.
As is always the case at the start of a new season, I tend to make sweeping and radical decisions about my new "Look" which rarely, if ever, make it to fruition. "I will wear makeup every day and look properly groomed." "I will wear skirts." "I will wear heels more often." This time the unrealistic starting point was "I will wear something through autumn and winter other than jeans." And so with this mission in mind I hit the shops.
And I was relatively successful. I have bought some trousers - not skirts of course but let's take one step at a time. So now all I have to do is wear them. You see I know myself well. I know it is unrealistic to believe that I will wear foundation unless I'm going out. I also know that on days when all I do is walk to school and back and then spend the rest of my time at home on my own ( which covers a large proportion of them to be fair) then the temptation is to go for ease and comfort. As I rifle through my wardrobe in the morning, I may pick out a pretty top, a nice scarf or an eye catching necklace. But my legs always end up clad in jeans.
But I am determined to try. So what if I don't see anyone? It's good to look nice just for me and, who knows? If I'm dressed up I might even sort myself out somewhere to go.
My purchases are laid out on my bed ready to obtain the seal of approval from my husband and I have already cleared out some old stuff on the "One in one out" rule that has to govern my tiny wardrobe.
So, when the weather starts to nip and summer clothes are finally put away, look out for me in something other than jeans. As long as I don't change my mind and take it all back of course.